Celebrate Ordinary Moments With Kids

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson # 26
There are no ordinary moments.

How many of us take the time to celebrate our everyday moments? How many of us do this with our children? Kids grow fast just yesterday I remember the day my son Parker was born, and that was 14 years ago. Time has flown by, and one thing I realized is that life is short and time does not stand still so it is essential to celebrate the most ordinary things and take time to slow down because one day they will be gone. Here are some ways to celebrate everyday moments with your kids.

1. Compliment Kids on the Small Things
What seems so small to us can be significant accomplishments for our children. I remember when my daughter Emma figured out how to tie her shoes and rather than the way we all were taught she came up with her idea, and the look on her face was priceless. She thought she had conquered the world not only tying them but finding a way that worked that was not ordinary. These are the moments that will build who our children are and give them the confidence to move forward.

2. Positive Words and Phrases
Positive words go further when dealing with kids than the negative. I remember growing up sometimes my dad would use negative phrases toward us as were growing up and I think that stuck with me the most. I never remember him congratulating us but only a handful of times and all the rest was a joke, or we were just dumb. I made it a mission when I had my kids was to break this cycle because it did affect how I felt and that I did not think I was capable of doing anything. Fixing this logic took many years and lots of self-exploration to teach myself that I could do whatever I put my mind too, and I am better off than I was years ago. Words can build, or they can destroy and be able to remember this will help you and your child’s relationship in the future.

Here are some phrases to use with your kids
I love seeing you…
I am proud of…
I love you
I am happy that you…

3. Hugs, Notes, and Time
Kids thrive on attention. It doesn’t have to be much and sometimes our lives can get very busy. I try to devote some time throughout the day to both of my kids. When they were younger I left notes in their lunch boxes, and they loved it and if I forgot I was sure to be reminded the next day. Both of my kids love hugs and always have. They need to have some contact at least once a day. When they were younger, it was more than that but as they have grown into teenagers if they get a hug or two that is fine with them. When Emma was younger she loved Play Do and would make food out of play-doh and serve it to my husband and I this was her favorite activity and we always made sure that we took the time to play along.  My kids also love to play board games, and we do try to fit this activity in as much as we can. Since I homeschool game time is part of our curriculum, and they thoroughly enjoy it.  The card game Uno is a family favorite and the kids never get tired of playing.  Spending a little quality time never hurts and doing what works best for your family will build a stronger bond
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4. Acknowledgment of the Good That is Done Today
Whether it be an A on a test or that they did all of their chores kids love support for the things they have done.
When teaching my kids if they are on a subject that is not their particular favorite I make sure to give them positive reinforcement when they have completed what they have done. It is hard to achieve something that is not your most favorite and letting them know that you are proud of them finishing the job will help them to be responsible.

Raising kids can be quite an adventure. Time does not stand still, and before you know it, they are taller than you, looking for work, and living on their own. Take the days you have with them and cherish every one. Create memories and help build them to be the people you want them to be. Even the little things can mean the most when it comes to our children. Giving positive words and phrases will build them into healthy individuals that can conquer the world. Spending time with them lets them know that you are making them a priority. Acknowledging the good that they work on helps them to become responsible adults. Just like when we plant a seed, we need to care for it to grow and the same goes for our children.

 

How to Use Charm to Benefit You at Your Next Party

Be a master of the social game.

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #21

You will always possess a charm and sense of humor that attracts others.

Do charming people have more carefree times in social settings? Thinking about this question gets me thinking how I socialize in specific environments. For the most part, I feel that I am warm and comfortable to communicate with and don’t see myself struggling in this area. I was a personal trainer for nine years and gave seminars where I needed to speak to an audience, and when I first started I was shy and many times would get the butterfly feeling in the pit of my gut before I was to speak. As the years gone by and I kept giving seminars, teaching classes, and working with new people these insecurities disappeared. The one talent I do wish I had more of was that of being charming. What is so wonderful about being charming? I feel that being lovely with those around us can benefit us much especially when it comes to critical social settings such as business meetings. Being charming can bring positive attention to you. This behavior can help make connections that may not have been made otherwise, and will even build one’s self-confidence. Sometimes when I try, I can be a bit socially awkward, and this is something that I know I could benefit from doing in social settings. Here are four ways that I plan on becoming more charming to those around me.

1. Stepping Outside the Comfort Zone

Why must we always step out of the comfort zone to get anything done? If we are comfortable, we won’t try as hard to get what we want. People like to associate with others who think outside the box. Think about the times you have conversations and who you like to talk with, are they boring or are they interesting to you? What makes them that way? Being creative in your discussions brings a little spice of life to the party, and you will get more people interested. Think of fun and creative ways that you can communicate with those around you. If you are at an office party, don’t start the conversation off about work instead find some common interest outside of work to discuss. Talking about hiking on the weekends will be far more interesting than the spreadsheets you look at every day.

2. Listen

Please be a good listener. Listening to those around us can be a hard one to follow and if you are like me and always thinking about what to say next. I have had to practice this one in the last few years and can say that I am grasping at this concept. I never knew how annoying this could be to be in a conversation and not listen till I started catching myself in this dangerous behavior. You will make more friends by lending an ear instead of a mouth. People love those that listen and pay attention to what they are talking about. Many times people don’t listen, and it is scarce to find a good listener. Remember when in a conversation don’t keep thinking about what you are going to say next, you won’t be listening, and that can get you into trouble. Recieve their message in full so that you can give a response that is meaningful to another person.

3. Focus on the Emotions

Make sure to check those emotions at the door. Making sure my feelings didn’t get the best of me was the lesson I learned when I was a trainer. It doesn’t matter what people think of me I can’t be shy and nervous when I needed to be confident and motivating. I would have never kept a client being shy and timid. I had to suck it up buttercup and put on that confident face to get through many of my seminars and sessions. After they were done and I had positive feedback it gave me the confidence to do the next one and pretty soon I no longer needed to check my emotions at the door. Give yourself a break and relax. Being able to relax and not worry about what and how you are going to start a conversation makes communication with others so much more comfortable. Don’t be hard on yourself and have fun in whatever setting you are involved with. If you are fumbling for your words and awkward, this will be a no-win situation for you, and you will inevitably crash and burn.

charm

4. Body Language Says More than you Think

Body language says a lot in a conversation and how you hold yourself will tell others quite a bit about you, and you want to make a good impression. If you stand tall, you are showing confidence. When we stand slouched and hunched over, we may give off the idea there is a weakness. Giving eye contact shows that you are listening and interested in what the other person is saying. Often matching the way others in the conversation are holding their body language will make you and them comfortable.

Everyone can have a certain amount of charm, and it takes a little practice to master the skill. Make sure to get outside of your box and be creative when engaging in a social conversation. Listening to those around us and paying attention to what is being said will make us valuable to those that are telling the story. Make sure to keep those emotions where they need to be and that it is better to be relaxed and confident then it is to be awkward and nervous. Take your body language and make it work for any social situation. Practicing these qualities will bring us closer to being the charming individuals we have always wanted to be.

Get What You Want With Goals

Believe to Achieve

 

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #11

Two things to aim for in life to get what you want and to enjoy it.

Wouldn’t the world be a fantastic place if we all could just get what we want in our lives? Too bad we all couldn’t just have a magic genie that could grant all our wishes. How can we still have reality and get the things we want in our lives? The answer lies in goals. Having goals gives us a vision and a purpose to achieve what we want. Goals are the closest genie we will get in life, and it’s time we embraced it. Here are some ways to crush your goals and create the life you want.

1. Believe and you will achieve
Many times most of us want to do great things, but we hold ourselves back from getting what we want. Holding ourselves back can be an array of reasons. We may not have the self-confidence that we feel we need to get to where we need to be. There is also a great sense of fear when it comes to challenging ourselves and trying new things. To be able to beat this curse learn to be a high achiever. Instead of thinking I will work at this start thinking I will do this. Change the way you think, and believe you will achieve.

2. Challenge Yourself
Like I mentioned above don’t hold yourself back. If we don’t try how will you ever know? Creating challenges for your goals can be fun. I am a fitness queen and love to work out. Exercise was not always my thing. I had to start from the beginning and work to where I am now. When I started, I was weak not mention my body was pretty sick. It has taken me three years to get to where I am now. Every time I would work out it was a challenge for me, and I had the mindset that I was going to crush each challenge. Some of these challenges scared me and other tasks I thought I would never be able to accomplish. Through hard work, discipline, and patience I was crushing each challenge and hitting each goal. Now that is not to say that there weren’t downfalls because there were, but I picked myself up and kept going till I obtained what I wanted. Challenges are mindsets to helping you get to where you want, and you feel amazing after you accomplish success.

3. Not All of Your Goals Will Work
Sometimes we think we want something and end up not wanting what we thought we would. Changing our minds is ok and helps us understand our real wants and needs. If you decide that what your working toward is not what you want just change your goal and move on. Strive to achieve the goals that give you the most excitement. These types of goals will be the ones we work the hardest on and provides us with the drive to create our vision.

4. Write it Down
I write everything down. I love to visualize what I am doing and what will happen in my future. Take these thoughts and put them on a vision board or paper and look at these goals. What I love to do is journal and keeping a journal helps me to take a look at my progress. It is a constant reminder of what I am working toward to getting what I want. I write lists for me to work on every day. It gives me a roadmap and lets me know I am one step closer to get what I want, and I am motivating myself to get things done and keeps me focused on the big picture.

5. Small Steps Leads to Big Sucess
Working on goals to get what we want can be overwhelming. Especially if the goal is enormous and we don’t even know where to start. Look at these types of goals and decide what small steps you can begin taking to where you want to be. Evey small step that you choose will get you closer to what you want to achieve. These big goals do not happen overnight, and it involves lots of work and patience. Rember that this is a process and keep visualizing the big picture. I used to tell my clients that I worked with in personal training that exercise and diet were not a quick fix and that this was a whole body challenge. Each of these individuals can make these small changes to reach what they want out of their fitness. It takes time, determination, and patience.

6. Get Help From Family and Friends
Working on getting what we want out of life is a whole lot easier if our family or friends are supportive and involved in reaching a similar goal. Having a support system is key to success. If you are working together to get things done, it takes all of the pressure off of one person. Usually, if the whole team is involved the goal is achieved faster, and everyone knows what is expected. An excellent example of this is our family budget. My husband and I work as a team when it comes to our finances. We have found by doing this not only are we on the same page, but we manage to get to where we need to be in a faster time frame rather than just one of us working on finances. My children are also on the budget train and know what we are spending and what we are not so there won’t be any hassles later on down the road. Doing this keeps us all in check, and we find that we don’t overstep our bounds. You can still obtain success without help it is more challenging, but if anything it makes you most substantial in the long run.

If there is anything we should be doing at this point, it is aiming for what we want out of life. Life should be what we make of it, and after we have worked to get where we want to be, we should be able to enjoy the fruits of our labor. By conquering our goals, we can live the life we want. Believe in our futures and move towards the outcome. Remember these goals don’t just magically happen overnight and it is essential to make changes along the way. If we can keep a focus on the vision and create a plan especially with friends and family soon, we can celebrate the life we have created for ourselves

Don’t Waste Time! 8 Ways to Turn Your Vision Into Your Reality.

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #8

Watch one’s thoughts become one’s actions.

Where do you see yourself?  Do you see yourself wanting more out of the life that you have?  These are questions that many of us struggle with daily.  You want to move forward but are not sure how to begin, and the thought of the change brings on intense feelings of doubt and uncertainty.  You can attain your vision, and you can overcome your fears, it may not happen overnight, but it can happen if you practice these 8 steps to help you take your vision and turn it into reality.

Write down your goals.

Writing down your goals helps you visualize what can happen.  Rather than dreaming of what you want you have taken the initiative to write these down and stick with them.

Work small than large.

Break these goals into small goals and significant goals.  Sometimes if we try to go all in it can be overwhelming and can lead us to feel discouraged which won’t get us anywhere.  When we finish the smaller goal, we feel like we have climbed a mountain and can work toward our bigger picture.

Don’t Get Distracted. 

It can be effortless to get distracted, and it is so important to keep an eye on the prize.  When these distractions arise do your best to control them and not let the overtake what you have worked so hard to create.

If it doesn’t work tweak it. 

Sometimes visions take more than one try, and we have to be patient and realize that if it doesn’t work the first time we try and make it work the second or even third time.  Life is not easy, and most things are not just given; it will take some blood, sweat, and tears, but it is all worth it in the end.

Get support. 

Surround yourself with people who want to see you succeed.  If you are around people who are not in your corner you will feel like your dream should never be a reality.  Those that love you will want to see you shine.

Realize that you want this more than anything. 

Hard work is precisely that, and nothing comes easy.  Be able to make the conscious decision that this is what your future holds and you will do whatever it takes to get there.  This includes sacrifices you may have not thought about and realizing you are making this choice makes the vision so much more important.

Practice makes perfect.

Whatever your dream is you need to practice.  Usually when you want to do something that makes you happy you need to learn everything about it. Dive in and learn all you can and then practice the techniques that are taught to get you where you want to be.

Be open to all options.

Don’t shut our anything because you think that it doesn’t fit your box.  Many times thinking outside the box will give you the best results.  Look at all your options and weigh them before making any clear cut decisions.

Today is the day to show what you are made of, and take your vision and turn it into your reality.  Don’t waste time dreaming and start using your time to create the reality you have always wanted.

 

Ask Yourself These Questions When Deciding to Make a Life Change

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #5

It’s up to you to make the next move.

Recently My husband and I have had to take a look at what direction our life is headed.   We are happy and live in a great area, but there are certain situations that we are wondering if we should make a big move when it comes to our future.  These decisions could help us financially but also will require some sacrifices in certain areas to get us where we want to be.  Life is never a dull moment, and we are now going to be making some serious decisions in the next couple of months. I feel like we are ready for a new adventure and am feeling very confident in the choices ahead.    If you are in the same boat and are struggling with some options that may make or break you here are some things to ponder on when being hit with that fork in the road.

What are my intentions?

What do you intend to do with your future?   Where do you see yourself with the decisions you plan on making?  Taking a look at what we plan on doing with our future requires us to take a long hard look at somethings we might be missing, and we can then see a pretty clear picture of what might become of the decisions we make.

Don’t act too quickly

I am terrible at this one.  I think of something that looks fantastic and don’t take the time to actually analyze all the outcomes and sometimes that has led unsatisfactory results.  Relax a little bit and let all the information sink in before jumping in.

How do I feel about the change?

I do believe that feelings are private guides.  If you don’t feel right about something, there is probably a good reason why.  That is why it is so important to give this idea time because you might think something is great and later on down the road after pondering it might not be such a good idea.

What are the problems I will face?

Even though something sounds lovely, there may be some issues that you will have to deal with, and being prepared for those issues will make a difference.  Make a list of all the problems and focus on the solutions for each of the issues you may face.  At least then you will have a guide if you happen to hit one of these circumstances and you won’t be the deer in the headlights.

Is this reality?

I am all for following dreams and aspirations.  I am practicing this right now with this blog,  but I also am a considerable realist, and I do know what my reality is.  I have kids, and bills so I have to take this into consideration and make sure my dream fits.

What are the positives?

Make your list of positives and focus on what can become of your life choice.  If the positives out weight the negatives go ahead and take the plunge.

 

Life is an adventure, and we should be able to take advantage of it; otherwise, it might be a little annoying.  Making big moves are scary and sometimes unexpected but it helps to have a little something to help you along the way.