6 Ways to Rebuild Trust That Was Lost

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #31
Trust is earned by many deeds.

Honesty is the best policy. We have heard this statement time and time again but what happens if you have broken that policy and need to repair the damage. Breaking trust is a hard lesson to learn, and it takes lots of time and patience on both ends. Know that if you work hard and stay diligent the trust you once had can be rebuilt and in many times become stronger than it once was. Here are six ways to restore the faith that was thought to be lost.

1. Be Honest.
It might be hard, but please be honest. Not only with yourself but also with the ones that have been affected. The gig is up, and it is time to get real. The more real you are, the better it will be to mend those broken fences.

2. Show You Care.
The actions that you do will speak louder than the words that you use. By showing action to someone, you are indicating that you care and are committed to fixing the problem. If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t act. The action also takes time and effort on your part, and that lets the other person know you are trying.

3. Respect
Respect is earned and not just given. Respect takes hard work, and if you want the same respect, you must work for it especially if you have been dishonest. One way to earn back trust is to think about how to restore what was lost and take the time to work on fixing things. It will not happen overnight and takes a lot of time, but it is well worth the effort to show the person you care how much respect you have for them.

4. Transparency
Be an open book. Honesty also involves you being honest with yourself. If you are hiding things, you are not honest with those around you. You need to be able to be comfortable in your skin and be comfortable with those around you to know who you are and being transparent lets the other person see a side of you no one else does.

5. Take the situation seriously.
Do this by sincerely asking for forgiveness and giving a sincere apology. If you don’t take the situation seriously for what it is, then you show that your commitment to fix what you have done is not there.

6. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
People are not perfect, and everyone makes mistakes. Just know that whatever happens, you can always do better after making a mistake. Don’t judge yourself harshly and think that you need to. Being dishonest to someone can take its toll, and it is better to learn from the mistake and move forward never making a mistake again.

Trust is a very fragile thing when it comes to dealing with relationships. When trust is broken remember to be honest from here on out to rebuild what was lost. Show you care by working hard to fix the damage that was caused. Be honest with yourself and others so that they can see the best of you. Take the situation seriously and carefully as it will be in a very fragile state for a while. Always know that you are going to get through this and see that you can take a bad mistake and make it into a great future by learning the lesson that it taught you.

How to Grab an Opportunity When it Comes Knocking

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #29
There is no security in life only opportunity.

When an opportunity arises, do you take it? I know that there were many times in my past where I was scared to take a chance and instead I held myself back. I soon began to realize that waiting around for the safety net was not going to get me where I wanted to be in life. Are you waiting for an opportunity to come knocking on your door? Instead of waiting here are ten ways you can grab yourself some opportunity today.

1. Challenge the can’t do attitude.
People who play it safe tend to have the I can’t do this attitude. Mostly out of fear of failing. All this will do is hold you back so instead of saying I can’t start replacing it with I can.

2. Vision
Vision is essential when getting what you want out of life. Vision keeps you focused and motivated to want more. Never lose sight of your what you want and work on it every day.

3. Commit to change.
Commit to making a change in your life. The difference does not have to be drastic it can be as simple as getting up 20 minutes earlier every day to work on what you want to make that change. Once you commit everything you are working on becomes more of a reality.

4. Forgive and move on.
If you are harboring unhealthy feelings toward someone get rid of them now. Harboring these feelings is energy that is wasted and instead use it for the greater good. These feelings might be justified but they are not healthy for you and that is all these emotions are doing is hurting you. Forgiveness gives you peace.

5. Find what is holding you back and fix it.
If something is keeping you from getting what you want to find out how you can change the situation. Making small changes can make a big difference, and you will start to see the results you are looking for in your life.

6. Open your eyes.
Look around you, and sometimes the answer will be sitting right in front of you. Many times we go throughout our lives and don’t even bother to look around and see what is surrounding us but if we are more open to the things that are around us abundant opportunity will be found.

7. Learn something new.
Knowledge is power, and if we can take a little bit of our time to learn a new skill, then we are only making ourselves closer to what we want to obtain. You don’t just jump into something without learning a little about it first.

8. Help someone
You never know where things will lead if you help someone that is in need. Maybe this person has something they can help you with as well. Always take the time to lend a helping hand.

9. Work hard
Hard work pays off, and you should never have anything handed to you. If everything is given to you how do you expect to appreciate the things that come your way? Working hard for your goals keeps you grounded and more aware, so you don’t lose them.

10. Socialize
This one can be hard for many of us and can create crazy anxiety but know that this can be a great asset and will benefit you in the end. Get out and socialize. Get to know new people and places many times the people you meet and the places you see can hold great opportunity options for what you are working so hard in life.

There is always an opportunity around every corner and today is the day so make sure to grab yours’s the next time it comes around.

Here is How to Stop Playing the Blame Game so You Can be Happy.

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #28
Think about your own mistakes rather than blame on other’s faults.

Why do people like to play the blame game? When I received this paper a couple of weeks ago, I sat back and took a long hard look at the times that I have played the blame game and what if anything it has done for me and the situations that I was involved. The answer to this question is that playing the blame game has done nothing constructive to any of the circumstances or relationships that were required. Nothing good has ever come out of me just blaming someone or something for any negativity in my life, and so I have decided that I am going to work hard at controlling how much of the blame game I will be playing and make sure that this game doesn’t negatively affect the things in my life.
Why does the blame game become so toxic? To blame someone or something is destructive rather than constructive. Blaming others rather than taking responsibility for your portion of the issue won’t help you or the situation better your circumstances. If you blame others for the problem than you don’t have to take responsibility for your part of the issue at hand and that will always be a recipe for disaster.
I grew up in an unstable home and for many years that haunted me with feelings of blame. I felt like I was a victim and was continually blaming the adults that allowed me to grow up in the situation I did. Last year I finally realized that it was time for me to stop blaming and take control of my life. One thing I noticed was when I was angry and condemning those that did not do their job I wasn’t happy. I could not find my joy, and all the blaming distracted me from moving forward in my life. I had to stop blaming even though some of these things were out of my control I had to let go and realize that we are here to make mistakes and hopefully learn from them.

There are four wrong ways of thinking when we are playing the blame game and all of these thoughts I had throughout my life.

1. Something is wrong, and I need to find blame in something or someone else for this situation. I feel this is a hard one to recognize because sometimes I feel like the responsibility can be justified. Even though the fault is warranted does not mean it is right to decide to place blame.

2. This person doesn’t deserve respect as a human being. I realize that we are all human and therefore we will all make mistakes and had to sink this one in when getting rid of my blame. The focus should not be about the person who has done me wrong so much as the person is controlling the way I think and act.

3. It is ok for me to treat those that hurt me poorly. I can do so anyway I want. There is no peace when you find yourself hating someone or something all the time. Letting go is the best medicine for this, and you will find happiness by knowing you have done your part.

4. I don’t have any responsibility for the problem, and if I admit this than I have to accept my responsibility and I would deserve the same treatment, I am giving. There are always two sides, and each side will have there own thoughts and actions. Even if you didn’t start the problem but the way you handled it was not the best. Life and people can be very frustrating and remember to take the higher road you will feel better in the end.

If you are experiencing conflict and blame here are ways to settle the blame game once and for all constructively.

1. Be willing to accept your part of the problem.
When there are disputes and problems, there is usually more than one creating the conflict. It is better to take the responsibility and try to make amends on your end. If the other side wants to accept their portion and help make things right tremendous and if not then you did your best.

2. Don’t lose respect for people.
There are some pretty cruddy people in this world, and they have made some horrible decisions in life. Being able to understand that you are not there judge and jury makes it easier to move forward. Always know that there is room for improvement.

3. Be more forgiving
I will be the first one to admit it is tough for me to forgive. I have grown up to be a person that has a shell of protection, and if I overlook, it weakens that shell. I started trying to excuse years ago, and I will say that it creates peace I never had growing up. All the anger and resentment I kept inside was a big green monster, and it kept me prisoner for quite some time. Only in the last few years have a finally been able to forgive and move forward. Forgiveness is hard, but it is well worth the work that goes into making it happen.

 

How to Release Your Inner Buddha and Enlighten You Life

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #27

To attain enlightenment is to be aware of your own Buddha.

Wouldn’t be nice to have an enlightened life? To be able to have the knowledge to choose what road you want to take in life. Many of us have had to travel our paths of life with little bumps along the way, and I for one consider life’s small cracks to be valuable lessons but wouldn’t it be nice if we could look at our lives and feel like we have taken the right road. Practice these 4 Buddha enlightening techniques and make your life a little more at peace.

1. Compassion
Compassion makes the world a better place. Giving those around you empathy and understanding will provide you with peace. Imagine a time when you were the most compassionate and how did that make you feel? There are some in our lives that we may struggle to show compassion. I think these are the most important individuals to be compassionate too. When you have compassion rather than anger you will indeed feel good in your actions and decisions.
It is also essential to have self-compassion for our actions. Just like those we have had troubles with we too must remember that we are human and if we make a mistake acknowledge it and move forward with a softer heart. Do not torture your self because others choose to act a certain way. Work toward making yourself better even though your compassion may not be received. Practicing kindness will create some of the most profound relationships you will ever experience in life.

2. Be Awake
Make sure to be awake in every moment of your life. Be aware of what is around you and pay close attention. Being attentive will cause a person to slow down and recognize certain gratitude. One thing I truly enjoy is hiking, and I am lucky to be in an area where I can go anytime I want. I love to hike the backcountry and take everything in around me. Slowing down to look at the terrain and listen to the mountains has given me certain gratitude for the things around me that I might not have noticed if I continued the fast-paced lifestyle. When you are awake in your life, you will be able to experience joy in the little things that you once did not notice. If you are experiencing struggles being awake at the moment can even help you overcome these obstacles. Knowing the things around you will also help you welcome those teaching moments that will come along the way.

3. Food is Special
I bet you’re wondering why on earth would food have anything to do with enlightenment. Food gives us comfort and happiness. It can strengthen our bodies and can hurt our bodies. Creating a positive relationship with food can benefit your life, by providing you strength and overall well being. Cooking your food can give you respect for the food you eat. My kids were very picky eaters when they were younger, and when my husband and I started making our kids participate in cooking dinner, they became less picky and more grateful for what was in front of them for dinner. Another way to become more in tune with what you are eating is to grow a garden. Gardening takes work, and it is well worth the patience. The fresher, the better and you will feel great accomplishment knowing that this is something you brought to the table.

4. Remove 3 Poisons From Your Life
There are three poisons out there that can keep you from enlightening your life. Greed, hatred, and delusions can create a catastrophe for the person looking for something better. These three things cause nothing but pain and suffering. If you experience these things in your life make sure to recognize what happened and remove it from your life as fast as possible doing so you will be able to be more at peace. The longer these things stick around, the worse you will feel. Eliminating these types of feelings will also give you freedom, and you won’t feel confined to the negativity.

Being able to make little changes in your life can make the most significant difference. No one is perfect, and it is hard to attain perfection but one thing is, and that is we can work toward being better people.

5 Reasons Why Love is Necessary For Our Lives

Is love necessary to your daily life?

Fortune Cookie Life Lesson #25

Love is as necessary to human beings as food and shelter. 

 

What is love and why do we need it as human beings?  I feel that love is a hard thing to describe and can’t be pinned down to one description. If I were to define the word love, I would say that it is a way that we act and feel toward things and people that we value. Love is sacrificial, and we will put others needs above ours, and not expect anything in return.  Being able to love yourself is just as important as loving others, and if you don’t enjoy yourself, you may not be able to give others love in return. Love is a complicated emotion, and it helps to truly understand what love is rather than what we think it should be. Here are 5 reasons why love is necessary for our lives and how to get the fullest amount of respect out of the relationships we deal with every day.

1. There is a Need to Love

We have heard in the past that there is a need to be loved but how many of us have heard that there is just a greater need to love someone else.  I often look at myself and think yes I am that person that pours her love into everyone else.  I have a husband and two kids that I fawn over and love on constantly. Sometimes I will admit that I will set myself aside and focus entirely on them.  I have gotten better at making a healthy balance out of loving my family but there for a while that was all I did was our my heart and soul into my family unit.  The reason I did this was that I felt the need to love and caring for them brought me life’s brightest moments.  Making these people in my life happy brought me happiness, and it does to this day.  Loving those around us gives us a sense of purpose to our lives. One way to show acts of love randomly is by performing small acts of kindness.  Kindness goes far in our daily dealings with our fellow man and doesn’t have to be anything extraordinary.  A simple hello to a stranger walking past or a small conversation with a grocery store cashier will brighten there day, and you will feel the warm fuzzies start to flourish which will make your day a little brighter as well.

2. Discover One’s Self

Love opens the door to self-discovery.  I think back on the times that I was not comfortable with who I was and most of these times my life was missing the critical element that someone cared.  When you are being loved and loving someone in return, you tend to let go of your insecurities that you once dreaded would come out to the world.  When someone truly loves you, they don’t care what your imperfections are and that gives you the freedom to find out what makes you amazing.  You no longer have to hide and worry instead it turns your focus on your life and what you want to accomplish.  When you are loved by another, this builds your strength to achieve dreams and futures.

3. Love Teaches us Lessons

We will not learn unless we do. Love can teach us the lesson of happiness as well as lessons of heartache.  Even though there will be times that will bring us to our core these life lessons are here to make us stronger and keep us from making the same mistakes.  Love can teach us the experience of a genuine feeling of wanting to do better.  Taking away the thinking of ourselves and being able to consider someone else’s well being.

4. Builds Future

It is essential to making a strong foundation for a home the same goes for creating a strong foundation for a relationship. Being able to love and be loved grows and gets stronger. To find a person that wants to work and build a relationship will put you both on the road to success because you will both work at making the future ahead brighter.

5.  Love is Healing

The best thing about love is the ability to heal.  Love heals a broken heart and spirit.  Think about how you felt when you have been your saddest, and someone sat there and just held you?  How did you feel at that time?  Giving something as simple as a hug shows that there is genuine care that can calm us even in the roughest of storms.

I know there are some out there that don’t think love is a necessity to live.  When I sit back and look at the things in my life that made me happiest, it all involves situations of love. We can show love by participating in simple acts of kindness. We will learn to love others and ourselves, and by doing this, we will know self-love.  Relationships teach us as we go along and without some sort of love, we would not have an opportunity to learn.  We can build our future with another person who wants to help us develop and grow.  There is no greater healing than that of love.