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Fortune Cooking Life Lessons #35
Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
Is there someone in your life that has wholly wronged you? Whether it be a family member, friend, or significant other something has happened that had created a fire inside you that you just can’t put out. I feel this is true for most people that one time or another we have come across the feelings of hate and discontent towards someone in our life. As time moves on we do move forward and these feelings will hide away for a time and every once in a while these feelings of anger that we had come creeping back to remind us of the knife we received in our back. But does hating this person help us in the end. If we stop to think about it hating takes a lot of time and effort on the part of the person that is angry. What if we could take that energy we have inside and put it to good use. Image all the awesome things we would be able to accomplish in our lives. Here are five ways to stop hating and use that energy for some good.
1. Don’t forgive for the person who hurt you forgive for yourself.
Forgiving someone who has hurt you is seriously a hard one to understand. When we learn about forgiveness, it is always about the other person but what we forget is that when we forgive those that have hurt us we are allowing ourselves to move on. The situation no longer controls how we feel or deal with that person and the control is lost. If we react to this person or situation negatively, it still has a hold of us if we move past it and forgive we are letting go.
2. We are all humans.
Humans are imperfect, and we will all make mistakes. Keep that in mind the next time someone does something that may hurt you. It is hard but what if the shoe was on the other foot. What if it was us that did the hurting. There will be individuals that don’t care about how people feel and know that you as a person can always do better regardless of how others may want to treat you.
3. Don’t bring up the past.
If you have completely moved on, you won’t be bringing it up anymore. Letting the situation go may take some time as time heals most wounds and when you are ready to move forward, you will be done reminiscing what happened. Moving forward also helps the person that has hurt you especially if they are seeking forgiveness because this shows you have completely forgiven them and moved on but if you keep rehashing what has been done there is unfinished business that needs to be addressed, and the problem never disappears.
4. Hating takes too much time and energy.
Hating someone takes up a lot of time and energy, and all it will do is exhaust you. A person can spend all day thinking about how much they hate someone but unfortunately, this waste of time and nothing will ever get accomplished. Instead of being angry and hateful take that energy and put it towards something that will make your life better.
5. Time will heal the wounds.
Time does heal wounds. Give yourself space from the person that has hurt you. Right now you need to process the hurt and taking a break can help you recover. Even if the relationship is unrepairable taking time off will help you to heal and find your peace in the situation rather than having to fight it all the time.
Being angry isn’t right for you or the people around you. Choose to do better and take that anger to a positive level. Forgive this person for yourself so that you can find your happiness again. Remember that human beings make mistakes and learn to let go of what happened. Don’t hate to long because it takes too much out of your life to do so and make sure to give yourself enough time to process what has happened.
If you are looking for a way to channel your negative energy, try meditation. It is a perfect way to relax your mind and spirit. A good forgiveness meditation is repeating the phrase ” The person I need to forgive is _______, and I forgive you for ________. Saying this phrase will help you put the situation in perspective and find happiness along your way.